um...yeah...

There is a little bit of internal war going on in my head. What else is new?

I am determined to win…LOL!

Seriously –

 

 

*sigh*

(hanging my head in defeat)

 

Hmmm...getting my feet wet....

No matter how many times I press the "remember me" button when I am signing in, blogger never remembers me and I have to type my whole e-mail address and password in again.
Daddy and I are sick.
I kept the kids home yesterday from the sitter because her grandaughter was throwing up, and I didnt want my babies to catch whatever virus she may have had. Somehow - someway Daddy and I ended up feeling a little funny by the time dinner time rolled around.
By the time bedtime came - we were down for the count. Sneezing and sniffling, I took some Nyquil, which helped me get a *little* sleep, but I woke up feeling like a bobble head. And only one nostril works. (how's that for a come back? LOL!)
So we are both home from work today, and the kids are destroying the living room because there is no energy to tell them to stop.
I am currently looking for volunteers to come take these children away....
No one is really jumping at the chance.

Why must it be so difficult?

OKay - maybe I can form some sentences now...

• The losing battle continues with trying to get our son into school this year.
• I still have not gone to school, but only because of the sitting situation. I cant ask the regular sitter for longer hours And we obviously can't afford more daycare than we have now. Daddy still has a very unreliable schedule, as he delivers to some islands as far as two hours away from us, and depending on traffic, well....
• Our little girl turned two in May. TWO. Where has the time gone?
• I still work at the same shithole - but I like the job. It's the people I hate. With a passion. Grrrrrrrrr.

That's about all I can muster right now.

Good Night.

Holy crap, it'sbeen HOW LONG???

Let me distract any stragglers with photos:

I need to write again. My mind feels like it's going to explode.

I also need to understand why the picture of my Little Big Girl won't rotate...

Life.

Sometimes there are the slightest crossroads that come up, and you dont even realize that you've veered just a little to the right and taken a way that you are familiar with but it's still change. Sometimes there is an obvious fork in the road and you stand there scratching your head before deciding which way to go.
Daddy veered a little to the right and took an old job position. More time at home, less stress (for him and myself, yes I'm selfish.)
I am standing in front of a fork. My head itches.
I went online and signed up for information at three different schools in my area. I have decided that where I am is not where I want to be and I need to take my steps to get where I want to be. The last time this happened, Baby Girl was born so I had to stick to my path and play slave mommy to another baby. Baby Girl is turning two.
Mommy needs to find herself.
The support of my dear husband is impeccable. The support of my mother, who will take the children if I have to go to school at night (and in the event that Daddy is not out of work) is divine.
My legs just need to stop shaking so I can step firmly forward...

My computer is being fixed – AGAIN. I have been very lazy to write, I know…but believe it or not lately my desire to be home instead of…well… anywhere else… is getting stronger. So I'm figuring I can sit in front of my puter and do something besides play games before I go to bed. (Damn those facebook games! LOL!)

I have been filling out applications for Charter Schools for Little Man. His birthday being in November puts him past the cut-off date in our state for going into school when he is supposed to, he will be forced to wait a year. I don't want that for him at all. And we can't afford Catholic School…never mind a regular Private School. I'm hoping at least one accepts him, and he will be right in there come this September.

I actually have to get some work done – so I shall be back. Sooner rather than later I hope…

The Losers...

The guys are making plans to go paintballing...and I can't go.
They go every year for a friend's birthday (I've spoken about him before, "S")...,his birthday is next Friday, and I''m super jealous because they get to get all decked out in the suits, wear the masks, shop for paintball accessories, while I sit at home and wait...wait...wait....
I have a lot of anger to let out! I would like to shoot some people! Hell, I can pretend I"m at work...
Last year, Daddy came home with a swollen finger, he caught a paintball (well, he didn't exactly catch it) right on his pointer finger, and it was swollen so bad he couldn't bend it. He was no worse than another buddy, who ended up catching a paintball right on the side of his neck. He had a bruise on there that I swear must have numbed his neck, it was really close to his artery.
The biggest guy of the bunch had many bruises on him, so Daddy doesn't let me go so I won't get hurt.
Phooey.
I want to go!

why is it...?

why is it so hard for me to actually sit down and write something??? I don't know what it is.
Job - still thinking. The health insurance is killing us...it would be better off if I weren't working and that's on my mind all the time. I should be happy to have such a job - where the threat of lay-off is far from anyone's mind...but the cost is terrible.
Grrrrrr.




These are my babies singing Twinkle Twinkle...
Enjoy.

friday - friday - friday!

I'm looking forward to hiding from the bitter cold in my home this weekend. Order in, watch movies with the kids in bed, and feel bad for Daddy working outside...

I'm also looking forward to spending some quality time in front of the computer catching up with my fellow bloggers...

I'm not looking forward to possibly quitting my job. More on that later.....

I've come to see -

that Christmas time for people with children is about giving the most annoying present you can give. So basically - how much do you hate the parents?
Okay - sorry attempt for a post - I have to break up a fight over a stupid, very loud, very obnoxious fire truck that was given to my son...