News-

My mother just sent me an e-mail, she received a phone-call at work that my cousins daughter just passed away. She was just born a week ago. She was born with complications, she had Down's Syndrome, there was something wrong with her heart, something else with her digestive system...and the little baby died. I'm sad, not only because she is my cousin's daughter, but because she was an angel that didn't even get a chance to live.
I must say that I'm happy they at least got to hold her and meet her, because I know there are so many people out there that don't even get that opportunity. They live in Puerto Rico and I'm poor so I can't make it to the funeral services...
This tears my heart apart, my son is going to be pissed at me, I'm going to smother him with hugs and kisses when I get home today. I can't thank God-or whoever is responsible for my son being healthy- enough for giving me the beautiful gift that is he...
I was terrified when I went into labor, they actually told me if I didn't get induced that night he would die...(labor story will come soon, if anyone wants to hear it...) that's not what any woman wants to hear...ever.
My prayers are with the family...I hope they can get through this, because I don't think I would be able to if it were me...


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Crazy/Hip Blog-Mamas
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Another girl...and a stupid question

Daddy's sister just called me to let me know she had her ultrasound and she is having a girl. She has a four year old daughter, who is the prettiest little princess EVER. She really wanted a boy because she doesn't want any more children after this. But still, she is happy and the baby is healthy thus far...prayers to keep it that way. Daddy and this sister are in the middle of a fight, (he has two sisters) and
the last thing I wanted was for her to bring me into it, but I commend her for not even mentioning it to me. She apologized for not coming to the party (which I was upset about because she IS Little Man's aunt-regardless) but I understood. Things will resolve soon, this happens all the time with siblings. I have a sister, too, and we actually went a good
three years without acknowledging eachother's existance. (That story to come soon...)

Now for the stupid question-
I called our "main" office to ask why I haven't received my check yet, after all it is Thursday... PAY DAY. The chick who answered the phone really asked me "Oh, you need that today?"
Deep breath from me.
"Um, yeah, it's kind of important I get paid on the day I was told I would get paid, seeing as how I have a child to maintain and a car that needs gas and food to buy for my family..."
"I will find out where your check is and I'll call you back."
Another deep breath.
Three weeks. It has been three. weeks. that I have had to go through this. They "forgot" to give me my check for three weeks. Once I even had to go to someone's house to PICK IT UP! That person being the one who was supposed to bring it TO ME AT MY OFFICE! I had to make a mad dash to pick Little Man up at the sitter's, drive as much like a maniac as i could with him in the car to her house to pick up my check, and then make it to the bank before they closed. I couldn't have been more pissed that day. And she tried to smile at me when she gave it to me. I know you must be thinking "why not just use Daddy's money?" Well, at that time he was getting out of work at 9 pm and he gets paid on Fridays... and there is no such thing as money in our account right now since both our cars decided to need expensive repairs at the same time last month. So money is tight now, and I need my goddamn check on Thursday. They could have just chosen to pay me on Fridays, but God knows I probably wouldn't see my check till Monday or Tuesday.
Deep breath....

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Crazy/Hip Blog-Mamas
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duh!

Blond Moment #7,452:
I left my car window cracked last night.
The driver's side.
And it rained.
All night.
I drove to work this morning sitting on a towel.


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Crazy/Hip Blog-Mamas
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Cake Face

This is my Little Man. With cake face. Tradition for my family-and basically all the "Spanish" of the world is to smear frosting on the birthday person's face after singing Happy Birthday. It's supposed to be good luck or something. Who knows- I just know it was done to me at every birthday party. And the torture continues...
His birthday party was great- he had a great time considering he was sick. He was having so much fun he actually ended up passing out from exhaustion for a couple of hours.
We meant to get his hair cut for the party- but all the running around I was doing trying to tie up the loose ends left us with no time for a haircut, so he sported his signature mohawk at the party. We love his mohawk, we actually are very apprehensive about cutting it off.
He loves all the new toys he got, he started playing right away. I think he was having more fun tearing the wrapping paper off, though, because even when it was off the present he would pick up a piece and start shredding it. (It's something about that noise, because he does it to the white paper at the doctor's office, too. Poor doctor has almost no paper left on the exam table by the time we leave.) So the little fucker is officially one. God, I was just holding a 5 pound baby in my arms! Now he's a twenty pound toddler. Where does the time go???

Great Love

I started this blog with the frame of mind that I need to vent. I have a very angry streak inside of me which I hold in most of the time, so as not to blow up on certain people. Like Daddy, who sometimes will deserve it, but not all the time. I definitly (how do you spell that damn word???) don't want to take it out on Little Man, he's just my angel- even when I feel my ears getting hot when he refuses to go to sleep. So if anyone ever ends up reading this- I apologize ahead of time for the swearing, for the posts that are directed to people who piss me off...not trying to offend anyone, just want to get some stuff of my chest.

Anyway-
This morning Little Man woke up at about 6:30. (he finally slept in his crib.) I put him in bed with Daddy while I went to take a shower. When I get out, they are dozing facing eachother, Little Man's hand on Daddy's face. I loved it. I wish I had a camera close by to take a picture of it. The affection that Daddy shows Little Man is like no other. He is not an emotional person by far, you can't even really see a soft side in him unless you've known him a while. But one kiss from Little Man does it, Daddy is putty in his hands. It's a great love I see between them. I wish I could take these moments and bottle them up and keep them with me always because I know there will come a day that Little Man and Daddy will fight, or Little Man will become "too cool" for us... and I will want to come back to these moments. I wish he could stay a baby forever. My baby.

Nyquil

Nyquil- the sniffling, sneezing, stuffy head, sore throat, coughing medicine so you could SHUT THE FUCK UP and let your wife sleep! medicine.
THAT is what the commercial should really say.
I'm glad Daddy has a great sense of humor- it's about four 0'clock when I give him some Nyquil- I turn to him and say "Now shut the fuck up I need some sleep." and we laugh. At four in the morning. It wasn't funny about five minutes later when the baby woke up and didn't want to go back to sleep. It wasn't funny an hour later when I was still trying to get the baby to sleep. It really wasn't funny when I finally woke up to see I was already late for my (usually rushed anyway) morning routine, got to work late and my boss was sitting at my desk. Wait- i have to say that part again. My BOSS was sitting at. my. desk.
Any other day he isn't in the office, you know, when i'm on time. But today I'm late and he's waiting for me. I felt like such an ass. And of course he probably thought it was bullshit when I told him I was up all night with a sick Daddy and a fussy baby.

To the PRICK on the phone

To the PRICK who called my job at 4 fucking 50 yesterday-
Listen ASSHOLE, if I tell you three fucking times that the person you are looking for is Not here - THEN THEY ARE NNNNNOOOOOOTTTTT HHHHEEEEERRRRREEEEEEE!!!!!!!
When you asked me the second time, I know you heard me getting testy, because you repeated "Oh, he's not there?" after I told you the first time. You didn't want his voicemail, you didn't want to leave a message with me, you just wanted to drive me fucking crazy!!!
What bothered me more was the fact that you asked me if I was "A Spanish". What the fuck is a Spanish? Were you trying to NOT call me a spic? because if you called me a spic I think it would have gone over better-
But I finally got you off the phone, no voicemail, no message left, you just hung up. And I couldn't be happier. I'm not allowed to shut the phones off until 5 on the dot- and at 4:55, you decide to call again.
And. asked. me. again. for . the . same. fucking. person.
Were you waiting for me to say "Oh yeah! he's right here, I was busting your balls the whole time! Hahaha..."?
"HE. IS. NOT. HERE. WOULD YOU LIKE HIS VOICEMAIL?"
"yeah, sure gimme that"
PRICK.
I drove home with Alanis Morrisette's Jagged Little Pill BLARING on my cd player because that's when she was angry. And she would have chewed that guys head off and spit it out on her ex-boyfriend's dinner plate.

The New Baby in Town

A friend of mine is ready to POP! with a little boy of her own. Last night I bought an ice cream cake with an Elmo candle for my Little Man and invited a few people over just to sing to him. I know i'm a sap- we are having an actual PARTY for him on Saturday but I didn't want his birthday to pass with out SOMETHING.
After we have cake for Little Man we passed by a friends house, who was having a small birthday party of his own. (Party=people coming over to eat food and sit in the living room watching TV.) My friend is having contractions on and off- I was watching her face as we were eating and every once in a while I would notice it get all wrinkly. She was trying so hard to keep it unnoticed-but HELLO! I have a child! and I don't think our Hosts would appreciate a child being delivered in their nicely decorated African-themed living room.
So being the asshole that I am I call out to her "Are you having contractions?"
Her: a nod
Her husband whips his head to look at me, then at her...
Me: Do you know how far apart they are?"
Her: "No, but they aren't close"
Me: "You realize you need to start counting, like NOW, because you could be going into active labor."
Her: "yeah. I feel pressure..."
Her husband is pale.
Everyone else in the living room is looking at her.
Me: "You guys need to go home she needs to lay down and YOU" i look at the husband "need to start timing her contractions."
They get up and gather their coats as I'm giving him orders "just in case" because suddenly I'm an expert... yet this exact time last year I was the one at a party having contractions while everyone was oblivious.
I haven't gotten the call that they are at the hospital but I'm sure it will be coming today or tomorrow...
Then my son will have someone else to hit.

For My Son

Today is your first birthday Little Man, and I could swear I was just in the hospital waiting anxiously (after the epidural) to hold you in my arms. You were born at 9:28 P.M, after 23 hours of keeping us in suspense, and making the hospital staff keep an operating room open just in case they had to pull you out. At about 9:15 you actually decided to start your journey on your own, and I couldn't have been more happy when I saw you. Tears in my eyes I reached out for you- and the doctor put you in DADDY"S ARMS. Asshole. Your Daddy sat in the chair with you in his arms and I couldn't think of anywhere I'd rather be. Finally Daddy gave you to me and I decided there was nothing better than you.
Your first year has been an interesting one, I nursed you for three months. That's three months with NO SLEEP because you wanted to eat every two hours. GREEDY. I had to stop nursing you because I came down with the nastiest cold/fever I have ever had and the doctors told me I had no choice but to wean you. I was heartbroken, but I wasn't going to put you at risk for anything. You took to the bottle pretty easily, as long as you got to eat right?
I look at you now, walking around with Elmo in your arms, and I can't believe it's been a year. I feel like I just changed your first poopy diaper, like I just gave you your first taste of applesauce. The Elmo you're carrying is bigger than you, we got him from Build-a-Bear, and it's the only thing I can get you to bring to me. Ever. You won't even bring me your binky, which you love...but apparently not as much as Elmo.
You hear the Sesame Street theme song in the morning and you rush to the living room saying "la la!", the closest rendition of Elmo's Song because you know he's coming on at some point.
You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, you saved me in so many ways. You are my ANGEL. (That was almost your name but Daddy wasn't having it!)
I look forward to the next year with you, my love, to all the adventures we will have.
For now I will close- but every adventure we go through will be chronicled here.
I love you, Little Man.

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This policy is valid from 15 July 2008


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