Tuesday, April 10, 2007

I'm not angry.

Here's the pic of my baby's face the day after he fell. The scratches on his lips were gone by the end of that day except for the bigger one on the bottom lip which ended up scabbing later on, the scratches on the forehead were already gone, the nose scab stayed a few more days, but it's gone now. I think the little booger picked at it, but it doesn't look like it's going to scar...
And do you see the yellow mark on his forehead? Right over his left eyebrow? Yeah, that's another bruise. I had gone to my sister's job to get waxed and he tripped over the same stupid shadow as earlier and he hit his head on the counter. He cried for like a second, and it didn't end up swelling or turning purple so DCYF was not called on me for messing my kid's face up.

As for this job sitch, I'm not angry. Hence the title. I had said it before-that I would probably cheer instead of cry at losing this job. I will admit, after The Meeting, I was in a bit of shock, like the "oh, shit, this is really happening" shock...and I called Daddy but I didn't say anything over the phone. Then I called my mother, and that's when I actually GOT IT. I cried for like a second, but then as I walked out the door and the fresh air hit me, I realized this is a good thing. It really is. How many posts are dedicated to the stress and agony of this place? The funny (but really not) posts about the idiots here...the fact that I've been here going on two years and still making $9 with no hope for a raise...
I love my boss. Really, where else would I be able to work and be able to leave in the middle of the day because my son got sick, and the boss wouldn't get mad or hold it over my head for a month? Where else would I be able to work and call five minutes before I'm supposed to be at work and tell them I'm on my way to the ER with my husband and not get any shit for it? Where else would I be able to tell people on the phone to go fuck themselves over the phone when they are being assholes and my boss have my back? He is great....Real Estate is not. And this isn't what I want to do anyway, so what is the point of crying over it? I wouldn't be able to do R.E, I would kill people.
When I got home and talked to Daddy he was actually surprised that it was happening so quickly, but he said "Screw it." And it was done. I will be on the phone with Unemployment after lunch to get that ball rolling before we end up with too much of a gap between paychecks. I will be calling the Welfare Dept. to see about them covering ALL of Little Man's daycare so I can go to school...actually I have to call the Community College here and see if I can still register for summer courses because the deadline on their website says the 6th was the last day...
It will be okay.
I know it will be okay.


I hope it will be okay...

4 comments:

DD said...

It will most certainly be OK.

I get frustrated at times with the "what is done is done" attitude I get from my husband, but at night when I'm tossing and turning, I just remember that and *boom* I'm asleep.

Maria said...

Oh, yes. You will be more than okay. Can't you feel it? You are really on your way!!!! I know this sounds sappy, but I honestly think that your future is so bright that you'll need to wear shades, sweets.

Mama of 2 said...

Diana...I know change is scary. I am living through my own changes at the moment. And I know it's hard to leave a place that you are comfortable even if it has its bad points it also has its good ones as well.

I really do think that this is where you are supposed to be headed. I just don't want to lose your blog since I know you mostly blog from work at the moment.

GOOD LUCK!!

Tuesday Girl said...

Good luck!