Monday, December 18, 2006

The Christmas Par-tay!

Friday night was our company Xmas party.
What a time...It was scheduled to begin at 7, I got there at 7:30. (I had to be fashionably late, I only live about five minutes away from the restaurant we had it at.) I couldn't count on both my hands how many people were already drunk. The appetizers were set up buffet-style in the center of the room, a delicious array of cocktail shrimp (that I ate about a million of), cheesy foccacia bread (yummy), salads of all kinds (overload of Caesar on my plate), cheeses and hams, plaintains (yeah, I couldn't believe that one)...way too much stuff.
As soon as I walked in, I saw my (drunk) bossman, and he handed me my two drink tickets. "These are only good for wine, beer and soda. Special drinks are extra." I wanted to ask him how many special drinks he'd had, but I went to put my coat away. This year's party was a no-spouse party, so we were all there solo, except for my boss whose wife has to show her Tiffany Diamonds everywhere he goes. (Yes, I said he, as in my bossman.)
I spot Head Admin and Other Admin as soon as I walk in, they had saved a seat for me at their table. Head Admin grabs a napkin and covers my chest. "I can see your boobage." she says. I winked at her and said "I know." I was wearing a nice red and black gingham shirt that was very tasteful, but very low cut. And my boobage was very noticeable, but I said "Hey, I can't wear this to work, gotta wear it somewhere." (Daddy liked the shirt...wink:wink)
One of the agents from my office walked in and made a bee-line for me. I love her, let's call her Blondie. "Did you hear that the tickets are only good for beer and wine?" And soda, but I guess no one cares about soda tonight... I nodded. She grabs my arm and heads for the bar. "Two Grey Goose and Cranberry." She pays and hands one to me, I could barely make out any cranberry juice in the glass. We load our plates with appetizers and sit at a table. Another agent from my office arrives, My Honey, and sits with us. She grabs at my chest like Diana Ross did to Lil Kim...I felt so violated. She and Blondie laughed. We talked and laughed and I sipped at my drink (that was STRONG!) and Blondie kept asking me if I needed another. Hell NO. Two other agents from my office arrive, two gay men who I also love, My Prince and Old Navy (totally a walking advertisement for Old Navy) and My Prince looks at me and says "How much did you pay for those things?" Old Navy laughs and says "That must have been a good Christmas bonus..." Assholes. My answer to them all after a while? "This is the best present my son could ever give me..."
Then the food comes.
Oh my God, the food. The meat cut up right in front of us, all kinds of stuff- filet mignon, top-whatever sirloin, chicken wrapped in bacon (also being called a heart-attack), turkey, chorico, garlic bread, fries, and more and more and more. I could hardly eat, but it was so good. I told Daddy we would have to go there for dinner one day. I got a soda to wash all the food down with and Blondie asks me why I didn't get another grey-goose and ice (I swear there was no juice in mine) and I told her I actually wanted to get home in one piece. She laughed at me and called me a light-weight.
Then there was the dancing. The band was a Latin-American band (Spanish, dammit, but the bossman wanted to be PC) and everyone was out there shaking to the music. Beantown pulled me out to the dancefloor, and I was too busy trying not to let him get too close to pay attention to the steps. (He was super drunk...) Then Loud-Mouth (from The Other Office, [TOO]) pulls me out for a slow song, and I'm all like Baby from Dirty Dancing saying "This is my dance space, that is your dance space."
Everyone started making plans to go to a bar together after the party, bossman included, and they kept asking me to go. "Nooooo....Thank you" I left at about 11, just as Crazy Lady from TOO was falling out of her chair. With no one around her. Yup, time to go.
I went home to find Little Man and Little Daddy asleep together on the futon, Daddy pretending to be asleep on our bed. (I caught him looking at me from the corner of his eye.) So I get into one of his t-shirts and curl up next to him to watch Sex and the City re-runs...or not. (wink:wink) Couples


Mama of 2 said...

My Christmas party is tomorrow night but I doubt it will be as colorful as yours was Miss. Sounds very nice though. Hubby gets to go with me as always so it's a nice night adult out for us.

Merry Christmas!

dennis said...

Man! That sounds like the party was just starting when you left!

Probably a good idea if the guys did not want to end up with black busted lips!!

Tuesday Girl said...

That sounds like a good party. Christmas parties I miss from not working anymore.

Diana said...

mamaof2- I really wish Daddy had been there, it would have been great to have someone to laugh at all these people with.
Dennis-I wasn't thinking busted lips...LOL...but sure! Busted lips!
Tues-I swear it's the only thing I will miss if I ever leave this job.

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Melissa said...

My company cut out the Christmas party this year so we could all get our bonuses (gives you some insight into how little my bonus is!!!), but I am not complaining, b/c I don't generally enjoy the whole uncomfortable office Christmad party thing!

Anonymous said...

Baby from Dirty Dancing --- how funny!

Sounds like you had a pretty good time. My job one was last week- it was , uh weird...

Diana said...

VJ-will do!
Melissa-I would have preferred the bonus, too, because now it looks like I'm not getting one. :(
tony-you're going to have to share the story, you know we all love the 'uh-weird' stuff!