Maybe I'll be a nurse for the weekend

Wait, I'm the one who NEEDS a nurse.
My friend .K. called me last night to tell me a)that a cousin of Daddy's had his baby. and b) she is frustrated.
a) There are no pics of the baby yet, so I'll have to wait to show you the newest edition of the family.
b)frustrated with what?

Now, remember, my mind is in a fog, I should have gotten that right away.
But I didn't.
So while my son slept, I listened to her complain about her husband .S. not touching her I don't want to hear this shit and that all she wanted was some attention. I made a motion for Daddy to get me off the phone, but he was paying more attention to the pizza he was eating. Thanks, Daddy. I owe you one. Remember this when you want to get off the phone.
So I tried to give her some pointers for some attention getting.
How about getting a babysitter and going out on a date, just the two of you? Get someone not me please I need some sleep! to take baby .K. for a night and go out and reconnect...
How about playing a game? Like Dirty Minds or something.
How about getting dressed up? Like a sexy costume ? Maybe he needs some shock & awe moves put on him...
She seemed to like that idea...except for the whole "I still have baby fat" issue. So what? I still have baby fat and my son is almost two. So I started calling out options: a nurse? Or a waitress? I was trying to give her options so that she could "hide" the baby fat. Buy the right size, and you won't look like a sausage stuffed into a toothpick, and you won't be uncomfortable.
Maybe I'll buy the nurse's uniform for Daddy and he could nurse me back to health?
LOL.
Sorry.
Was it good advice? I mean, given the lack of sleep I'm surviving on right now...