Horse Pills

So I went to the doc yesterday. I tried to get out of it...I really did.
"Who will stay with Little Man? I can't have him running around the office like a monkey." I asked Daddy on the way to pick Little Man up from the sitter.
"I will stay home with him." he says.
"But then you can't come with me. He should probably stay with my mother."
"Your mother still has that sinus infection, do you really want to risk Little Man getting sick?"
Shit. Good point, asshole.
"I have to cook you guys something to eat."
"You didn't take any meat out of the freezer this morning..."
"Then we'll just wait for it to thaw."
"Let's order pizza."
Shit. but wait...the pizza could take forever to get here...
The doorbell rang twenty minutes later.
Nice day to be EARLY dipshit.
I asked my mother to go with me, yeah I'm a big baby.
I get to the medical center and there are two people in the waiting room. I fill out the paper work, and try to sit (it's already beyond uncomfortable) and read a magazine. Half an hour later I'm ushered into a room and told that a nurse would be with me shortly.
Enter Cute Male Nurse...
Figures.
"What seems to be the problem?"
I describe the bump, tell him it hurts, tell him it's leaking (yes, it was leaking clear fluids. Have I grossed you out yet? I was thinking maybe it was my spinal fluid and any moment now I would lose sensation in my legs...) and tell him it hurts. Did I mention it hurts?
He takes my blood pressure and temp. "So you work at Company Name here, huh? How's business?"
Are you kidding? You're taking my vitals and I could die on this bed and you want me to talk Real Estate with you? Dude...
"It's a little slow."
"So now is not a good time to think about selling?"
Dude...

Enter Doctor.
"I'm going to ask you to lie on the bed facing the wall so I can see the bump...
Hmmm. I see."
I get back up.
"You have an abscess. Blah,blah,blah, soak in the tub twice a day I'm a mother and I work full time I can't soak in a tub twice a day! It's a miracle I get ten minutes for my morning shower!, blah blah blah, I'll give you a shot of antibiotics along with a script. The nurse will be with you in a moment."

Enter Cute Male Nurse.
"The doctor wants you to come back Thursday so we can check it again and see if it should be drained. I'm going to give you a shot of antibiotic and you'll also get a script for Vicodin because it's going to hurt."
Vicodin for a shot of antibiotics? Is it too late to say I was making the whole thing up?

I can see why they wanted to give me the vic's...that shot hurt like I was getting another epidural. Holy hell... I swear my leg went numb how the hell am I going to drive home? and they made me sit there for 45 minutes while it "sunk in". I drove with my left foot, try it and see how safe that really is. I went to the 24 hour pharmacy near my mother's house to fill my scripts. The antibiotics look like horse pills, they are HUGE.

I got home about tenish, the boy and Daddy were asleep. Great, he didn't even miss me.

The good news is as of this morning the bump went down, but it still kinda hurts. So hopefully when I go tomorrow I can pretty much just wait for the antibiotics to kick in full gear and take care of it without cutting me open. 'Cause then the alien would come out before it's ready, huh Tony?