Thursday, August 17, 2006

What would YOU do?

My SIL called me last night to invite me to my MIL's birthday party coming up in two weeks. "Girls only!" She said. "There is going to be a stripper!"
Oh joy.
I don't like strippers, but it's my MIL's birthday and it would be so rude of me not to go. We talked for a few minutes and she ended up asking me if Daddy would watch Little Daddy that night.
Why would she be asking me that?
The Whore is going to be there.
Tires screeching, glass shattering, screaming monkeys in the backround.

This is where it gets interesting: His whole family still talks to The Whore. BOTH of my SIL's still invite her over to their houses, they take Little Daddy overnight (even when WE are not 'allowed' to) they talk on the phone constantly. It's easy for me to pretend I don't know about it, because at least they have the decency to not have her around while I'm around. At least they don't talk about her (too much) in front of me. But IT BOTHERS THE FUCK OUT OF ME. After she told me that, I got quiet. I started scanning my mental files to see if I have anything to do around that time...anything to get me out of going to the damn party. When I got off the phone, I told Daddy. He understood for a moment, then (THEN!?!) decided to say "Well, it's not like you have to talk to her or anything. You're going to be there for my mom." Yeah, dude I totally see your point but nobody seems to be seeing MINE! I don't want to be around her. I don't want to see her. I will be thinking of different ways to scratch her fucking eyes out the whole time I'm there. I don't understand why your whole fucking family is still buddy-buddy with her.
Maybe I'm over-reacting, but I don't see why they include her for family events. She's Little Daddy's mother, who gives a shit. I was the one taking care of Little Daddy when she decided she didn't want to be a mother anymore, when she decided to move to Florida and leave him here. We had custody of him for more than a year and a half, it was only when I got pregnant that she decided she wanted to be a mommy again and took him away from us, playing these fucking games where we can't even see him FOR MONTHS!
My blood literally boils when I am around her, you couldn't even understand unless you've been in this situation...
I really don't want to go to the party, but I have to, don't I?
What would you do?
Please tell me what I can do! I'm begging here.


JayMonster said...

Suddenly get ill the day of the party, send along your birthday wishes and present after the fact.

Oh, The Joys said...

You don't have to go to the party and you don't have to lie either. I think you should sit down with your MIL and both SILs and tell them how you feel when you're around her and ask them to work with you to figure out strategies that would make it easier for you.

sourpatchbaby said...

I think it's extremely disrespectful of the SILs and the MIL to expect you to be in the same room as that woman (never mind that they are still buddy buddy with That Thing What Came Out The Poopy Chair). I would ask them what was more important for them to have at the party; to have the woman that ruined their son/brother's life and caused him endless hardship, or to have the woman that brought joy and happiness to him. Sometimes people need to be confronted with the truth. Plus, you know that TTWCOTPC is only doing that to get at you. Since she wanted to be the wife and is not, she is doing all the things the wife does with the family. She is basically wanting to show Daddy that she is the better woman of the two (which she is most definitely not, as whores are a dime a dozen and real women are hard to find).

I vote we tar and feather her. Maybe we can pour honey over her and tie her next to a nest of fire ants? She needs to realize that she will never be with Daddy and that being around his family is not going to get him back.

Mama G said...

Don't go. There's no need to put yourself through that shit. You'll be miserable - and if you're at a party, and you look miserable, everyone's going to think that you're not being friendly, or that something's wrong with you. Spare yourself the pain.

I know it's a sticky situation - and I can't even pretend to know how you're feeling, but I can imagine that it's gut wrenching. I certainly wouldn't want to be around the whore. What good could come of it? NONE!

Unless you feel comfortable being honest with your SIL (which, depending upon their personalities, could backfire), I'm with jaymonster who suggested suddenly getting sick the day of the party. Food poinsoning always works well. Fish, anyone?

sourpatchbaby said...

I don't get the SIL. Why does she have to ask you if Daddy can babysit? Is not like The Whore is mute and can't ask herself. Do you think she put SIL up to it?

Jen said...

Oh honey, I know how you feel. I've got a 5 y/o step daughter. When Hayden was born..her mother told her that whenever the baby cried, she'd get yelled at. Needless to say, she wouldn't come to our house for over 3 months. I still have to see that horrible woman more often than I care to. Mainly because of her and Will's teenage boys and all their events that tend to bring us all together. I hate it, and Will knows it. She even calls here to talk to me when she's mad at Will for something. HELLO!! I DONT WANT TO HEAR YOU BAD MOUTH MY HUSBAND!!

Anyway, I agree with oh, the joys. Call your MIL and SIL's and tell them that your not comfortable being there if The Whore(I'd use her real name! LOL!) is going to be there.

Mama of 2 said...

I agree with the suddenly getting ill the day of the party. Apologize to your MIL if you feel the need but don't put yourself in a situation you don't want to be in. I know I wouldn't.

I agree with you that all of it's wrong. I wouldn't care either if she's Little Daddy's mom or not....who gives a f*ck.

I have had my own issues with something along these lines and I have very strong feelings when it comes to it all. Sorry for the not so nice language.

Good Luck to you and I will keep you in my thoughts -- as you are gracious enough to do the same for me.

dennis said...

Diana: Well you have some serious issues boiling. Personally I would tell the whole lot of 'em to pucker up...

BUT it might mean you cut off Hubs family and that might not be the cure. You and hubs need to generate a discussion with the 'in-laws'.

I would also go to the party and hang out with the WHORE, just trying to make her uncomfortable. But I am twisted that way.

If you do not want to go. Don't go. If hubs wants someone to 'be there' for dear old mom, tell him which dress he looks best in and send him out...

SuperMom said...

Okay, I think you should go and try to be nice.

What would I do?

Totally lie my way out of it :-)