Karma throws a punch...DIRECT HIT!!!

I told you I shouldn't have opened my big fat mouth yesterday. While nothing happened with my son (phew) Karma decided to take a punch at my car.
*sigh*
I haven't had a problem with the stupid car since the whole transmission fiasco I never wrote about because I would have killed someone I was so angry. The car has been driving fine, has been pretty good on gas (YAY for 4 cylinder Hondas!) and, shit, the AC has worked on really hot days. Can't complain.

Until yesterday.

I wrote yesterdays post and got some work done. 12 o'clock rolls around, and I call Daddy to tell him I'm on my way. I get into the car, turn the key, and...nothing. No lights, no turning of the motor, no radio...the battery is dead. I check my lights-they were off.
Wha?????
I start making phonecalls to the agents I like, to see if any of them are close by with some jumper cables. Nope, not a one. I start calling the Other Office. My boss says "eat lunch at one of the restaurants on the Avenue.""Um, yeah, but that still won' t get my car moving and I do have a home to get to later."
So he tells me to go to the gas staion near my office and tell them to give me a jump, that he would pay for it if it came to them wanting money. (No one does anything for free anymore). They send a guy with a battery pack, he hooks the cables up...and still nothing.
I think I hear a faint clicking sound coming from inside the car, maybe a bomb?
He says the battery pack must be dead and goes in search of another. He returns with a second battery pack, still nothing. But I still hear the stupid clicking. WTF is that? He starts looking around under my hood and starts banging on the starter it's not the starter buddy and touching shit don't touch anything under there and tells me my starter must have gone.
It's not my starter, those things don't just go without warning, I've had a starter go on me before and they are very dramatic with their exit. "You should bring the car into the station and we can take a look at it for you..." Yeah. so you can charge me a million dollars to tell me my starter went, put a new one in just to not have the car start even then. Thanks but no thanks. "I'm going to make a few more phonecalls, thanks."
I call Daddy and want to cry because HELLO! NO MONEY FOR CAR REPAIRS! but he tells me to sit tight do I have a choice here? that he would come to my job with his mechanic buddy, Choo.
When they get to my job I tell Daddy about the clicking and he gets this look like a lightbulb going off in his head.Turns out the car had an alarm system before I bought it that was never properly taken out. The clicking was the alarm going off, but since they took HALF of it out, it wasn't making actual noise. For some reason the alarm started going haywire yesterday and shut the whole car down. So Daddy and Choo had to get into my car after work yesterday to start taking the wires from the alarm system out.It's fixed now. For free. I love Daddy and Choo.
And guess what? I never had to replace the starter...

News and Forums

Ever feel like your questions about your telephone and internet services are stupid? Ever feel like you're the only one having certain problems? Don't you wish companies had forums for customers to discuss their services and problems with eachother? (Do I sound like a car salesman yet? That's my goal here...)
Anyway, my mother tells me she wants to get Vonage for her home line, because she's sick of the way Verizon is being. I don't have a home telephone so I personally don't give a shit. I guess she's falling for these commercials she sees on t.v about their 'great service' and 'great plans starting at something ninety nine!'.
Whatever Mom. So she calls me at work, interrupting my blogreading (what? did you think I was doing something constructive here?) and telling to to go to the VoIP Forum so I can see for myself that the company is helpful.
Again, whatever Mom.
But I looked anyway. And they actually do have forums discussing this and that (which you really don't see any other companies doing), and they also have News and Reviews (new products and services, and reviews of these new products and services), and they let you handle your account online (as do most companies nowadays...so that's not such a big thing.)
But, whatever Mom.
I have blogs to read, 'kay?

This is me taunting Karma...

I haven't written much about my Little Man lately. That would be because he is just being...normal. Nothing out of the ordinary has happened, (well, he got a fever last night but that's from teething, His Vampire teeth are coming in again) so he isn't giving me much to say. He's talking more...still no sentences, but he's actually pulling two words at once. Well, he says waaay more than two words but there are only two in a row that make any sense.
Words he can say clearly and in context:

• Apple
• bye-bye
• hi
• car
• bike
• parque (Spanish for park)
• oh, shit (yes, you read that right. We're horrible parents, but guess what? He learned it at the parque.)
• pane (plane)
• Mommy (I'm no longer just Ma, that's saved for my mother.)
• carne (Spanish for meat)
• papa (potatoes in any form, french fries, mashed, baked...also in Spanish)
• juice
• cheche (supposed to be Leche, Spanish for milk.)
• ice (ice pops. He's addicted)
• No
• Daddy
• Titi (auntie)
• shoes
• feet
• eyes
• ears
• nose
• cat
• wow-wow (doggie)
• move
• Choo (a nickname one of Daddy's friends has. He loves Choo.)
• Mine

There are others (many others), but I can't think of them now. He tries to dress himself. He feeds himself. He makes car noises. He grabs your hand and leads you to where he wants you to go. He pats the couch/bed when he wants you to sit/lay next to him. He brings books when he wants you to read.

Nothing big, just normal growing up. Which I still wish I could slow down....

*Now just for me writing this he's going to end up with a lump on his head for trying to do back flips and cartwheels at my sister's house...

Here he is feeding himself at Grandma's house. Notice her nice cream-colored carpets. Spill-proof, but guess what? Grape juice defeats anything! And what the hell is she doing letting him eat on the floor? She yells at me for feeding him on my own couch at home, and yet she does THIS. Unbelievable....

Here he is on the Bob The Builder ride at Wal-Mart. He's loving Bob now, along with "Melmo" and Bear...

Just Great

*Sidenote before I even start- I just slammed a desk drawer on my index finger and it hurts. It's throbbing. And it hurts.

Anyway- New Mortgage Company is hosting 'cocktails' at a 'Get To Know The New Mortgage Company' party on Thursday night. I don't wanna go! But it's already started, the guilt trips: "You're a part of this company, you should go." All I do is answer phones, I don't do anything that has to do with the mortgage companies. "Come on, it'll be fun. All the Agents will be there." You mean the agents that will flock to me are the ones I don't like anyway...I'm going to have to make sure my buddies are going. "It's going to be Open Bar." I don't drink anymore...
So in the end I'm going, even if for a half an hour. Long enough to show my face to everyone so they can say "Yeah, I saw Diana there!" and my boss can't say I don't attend Company functions.
Daddy will be home with Little Man...
I will probably be seeing agents dancing on tables after they've enjoyed the Open Bar too much...
I will be trying to stay away from the New Mortgage Guy so he doesn't take my "Hello. Nice to meet you." as an open invitation to hit on me...
*sigh* I really don't want to go.

For Dawn

(if she happens upon here to see it...)

I've said it before, Dawn loves her some gnomes. She has cool ones in her garden, watching over her flowers. Seeing them displayed in her garden made me want to get one or four. BUT! I dont have a garden. (I'm fighting to be able to get them to just have them in the backyard, giving some light to our now-dark walkway.) Imagine my surprise when I happen upon the website (to lovingly admire and desire them) and I see that they want to clear their summer inventory to make room for Christmas stuff. (Don't even get me started on stores already getting that holiday stuff out...geez, Louise!) They are offering their adorable little gnomes at discounted prices. I found a new one I like-but I really couldn't put him anywhere since there are no trees in my yard:Don't you love him? Maybe I could put him on the clothesline that no one uses? Maybe hang him from the gutters? Or perhaps I can ask my backyard neighbors if I can hang him off their Pear Tree that hangs over our fence. (Yeah, my neighbors have a Pear Tree that drops nasty looking pears into our yard all the time. It should be the least they can do right?)
I'm still working on getting my light gnomes (blogger wouldn't let me upload the pics last time, today they went up with no problem. Stupid Blogger.), Daddy is no longer just saying "No." so I think he is softening up.

better and better...grrr.

Yesterday is erased from my memory forEVER. Well, after I tell you how it ended up taking some twists and turns and made me want to change my own name to Stoopid.
I called the bank as soon as I realized my card was missing, told them my last purchase, total and time and they shut the card down. They would send me a new card in 7-10 business days. Joy. The rest of my day at work was shitty, because I was already miserable about the card and the letters. It seemed that everyone who called yelled at me and I seriously just wanted to go home and cry.
Daddy comes to get me from work and as I'm walking out the door I remember that I had worn a jacket to work in the morning, so I grabbed it off the coat rack and left. Suddenly like a light shining down on me I get the idea to check my jacket pocket.

THE GODDAMN CARD WAS IN THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Apparently after I swiped the card at the pump I put the card in my pocket with the intention of putting it back in my purse when I got back in the car, but never did.

Can you believe this? I felt like such an idiot. Daddy laughed at me, which made me feel worse. After getting Little Man we went straight to the bank where I (lied) told them that I had dropped it at the gas station and the station attendant found it and saved it for me. (Hello! I didn't want them to see what a moron I was!) They re-activated my card and told me they would still watch for any purchases made during the day and I wouldn't be liable for anything. Huge sigh of relief from me, though I know there won't be any suspicious purchases, but because I'm grateful to have a great bank where all the employees know me and treat me soooo well.

So that's it. As of this sentence, yesterday is erased from my memory, it never even happened. Pretend with me, would ya?
(P.S- Nita, if you read this, I'm totally inviting you over with a bottle of peroxide, we can dye my hair blonde...it would fit me well right now.)

To satellite or not to satellite?

That's the new question in my house. I told Daddy I wanted to get the digital cable back and he set up a counter-offer: What if we got satellite?
I knew where this was coming from, we had just gotten a shitload of junk mail and a 'coupon' for Dish Network was in the bunch. His eyes were lit up like a kid at Christmas. I told him I would prefer digital to the dish.
"Why?"
"Well, because when we get shitty weather, like we're having right now, it. won't. work."
"What are you talking about?"
So I went on to relay to him how my sister had satellite when she lived with her ex-husband, and the only time she would call me on the phone was when it was raining or snowing pretty bad out-which would knock off her dish service. (Yeah, what a bitch. LOL. I always knew to expect a call from her when the weather was shitty. I took to answering the phone saying "Dish customer service how can I help you? Oh, you're service is out again? OH WELL!" I'm an ass.)
Their coupon listed over 120 channels for $29.99 (which I am still trying to find the little * that says for the first three months or something) which is better than digital. (digital would come out to like $80)
I'm going to have to turn to you guys: anybody have Dish? Or any satellite? Is the service bad/good/GREAT! ? (Basically, are you a satisfied customer?)
I need feedback quick, because shitty weather is hitting New England soon, and I will be vegging out on the couch with my two guys, watching t.v. because it will be too cold for me and Little Man to hit the parks.

Did you think it would end there?

Today is very quickly becoming a day I should have stayed home and hidden under the blankets.

I go to Cumberland Farms to get something to drink for me and Daddy-since I was good and cooked extra last night just so we would have lunch today...


I lost our ATM card.

Me; the Holder of the Money, the Keeper of the Finances, the Responsible One...

Daddy was upset, but I bet he couldn't even begin to imagine how I am feeling right now. I just used the fucking card to get gas this morning!
I'm feeling like the biggest idiot in the world. I should put a sign on my desk telling people not to give me any work today if they don't want it lost or messed up in some stupid way.

Is 11:20 a.m too early to go home?

I'm about ready to leave the office screaming at the top of my lungs and ripping my hair out.



And it's my own fault.

Don't you hate when you have to admit that???

Beantown gave me a letter to personalize and send out to 600 people. Yes, that is sitting in fron of the computer and writing each and every person's name and address on the letter and then doing the envelope with the same info. EASY! I've done this for him before and got stellar results. (That would be why he gave me more to do, right? Makes sense...)
Except today is Monday, and I got about four hours of sleep last night...brace yourself...

I sat at the back computer (the only one connected to our color printer. There is color in the letter!) at exactly 9, ready and eager to get these letters over and done with. I got to about number 400 when I realized I forgot to put the address of the property he wanted the letter to be about...the stupid address was supposed to be in the body of the letter and I got everything right except that! 400 letters on company letterhead in the garbage.
I'm taking a small break before starting over. I'm going to read blogs to calm myself down, because I am PISSED at myself.

Funny Joke I read today:

Bob works hard and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym. His wife thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club. The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Bob! How ya doin?" His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. "Oh no," says Bob. "He's on my bowling team." When they are seated, a waitress asks Bob if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, "How did she know that you drink Budweiser?" "She's in the Ladies' Bowling League,honey. We share lanes with them." A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Bob and starts to rub herself all over him and says,"Hi Bobbie. Want your usual table dance, big boy?" Bob's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club. Bob follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her. Bob tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it. She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every four letter word in the book. The cabby turns around and says, "Geez Bob, you picked up a real bitch this time."
(found here)

Oh my God, watch this video- it's freeeeaaaakkkkyyyy.
And this one: there are just no words, don't drink before you see it. Trust me.

You're sharp, dude.

I walked out of the office yesterday and got into the car. I notice Daddy is looking at me, smiling instead of pulling away from the sidewalk.
"What?"
"Cold in the office?" he asks.
I look down and start laughing. "Dude, what are you, like twelve? DRIVE!"
That's why I love you, dear.



***And can I just say a Fuck You to blogger. I could not get the page up since I came to work this morning. It's a miracle it's letting me post now. Let's see if this even publishes...

I'm Angry. Grrr

Why is it that I get all excited about my new project only to have multiple things happen to me on my lunch break to send me into a homicidal rage?
Beantown asked me to go and pick something up for him while I picked Daddy up from work. Sure, no biggie. I get to Daddy's job only to get A LOOK from him and a "That tire's low again." Again=it was low a few weeks ago and we speculated that we may have a slow leak but forgot to do anything about it. "Let's go to the gas station to put some air in."
Okay, better to be late to work than to get in an accident. Let's go.
We get to the first gas station. Yes, I said first, as in we had to go to more than one. They had a HUGE sign advertising their air pump, and yet there was no air pump. There was a vaccuum, a shampoo station, an air freshener station, no air pump. Hmmm. On to the gas station across the street. Hey, look an air pump, let me just get some change out of my ashtray...wait. Where is all my silver change? Why are there only pennies in here?
"You don't happen to have change on you, do you?"
Daddy gives me a stupid look, "You are the Holder of the Money."
That doesn't mean you can't have a few quarters on you, stoooooooopid.
I grab our ATM card. Maybe they have a debit machine inside I can get a few bucks...
No debit machine, but a nice shiny ATM machine that charges you an arm for withdrawing money from it. I hand my arm over and take my twenty to the counter, asking the guy if I could have a dollar in quarters. "I can't open the draw unless you buy something." Bullshit. "Look, all I need is SEVENTY FIVE CENTS to put air in my tire so I can get back to work and get on with my day."
Blank look.
I think I heard crickets.
Huge sigh.
I grab an ice tea out of their fridge and he takes forever to count out my $18.94 change, and I finally give Daddy the stupid quarters so he can fill my tire.
Now my question is: Why are we being charged so much money for AIR??? Don't we breathe air for free? Belive me if I could blow the fucking air into the tire I would, but I really have to PAY FOR AIR.

Wait it gets better: I get back into the office just to hear Stoopid telling my bossman that I seem to have made a mistake on the September calendar. She doesn't know I can hear her, she doesn't know she's getting another entry on my blog. She tells my boss "I think she made a mistake, she put The Shitter on here twice in a row."
"What do you mean?"
"See? Look-" she hands him the calendar-"his name is on twice in a row every week."
"Stoopid- The Shitter and My Prince (I haven't talked about him, I like him, he is my prince) have the same first name. Do you notice she put their last initial after their names? It's so people know which their first name here is on the calendar that day."
Oy, what an idiot.
Did she really think that by pointing out my 'mistake' to my boss she would get me in trouble? Does she really keep forgettng that I've been here a year (yeah, I know, not much) and she's been here like a month? Guess who knows what's up? I hate that she was trying to make me look stupid to him. If she thought I had made a mistake, she could have addressed me about it not go snitching to my boss. (By the way have I mentioned I love my boss? because I do, he knows I'm not stupid!)
I'm done.
Hopefully that's it for today.

I love projects!

YAY! My bossman has given me a project! (and here I am blogging instead of DOING it right? right?)
I get to order new window treatments and blinds for our HUGE windows! (I have floor to ceiling windows on three sides of my office. Can't walk around picking your wedgie here, everyone on the street will see it.)
This is exciting! I get to play interior decorator and pick out whatever I want (with his approval of course).
The only demand he had was that they are room-darkening, because with these windows comes lots of sunlight and it gets HOT in our conference room. Stifling hot. (I never use it, so I never notice. Agents have complained, but then don't they do that about everything?)
So far my favorite has been the Roman Shade style. Nice, sleek look, room darkening, elegant so it doesn't look cheap-o. Our walls are medical office blue (gag!) so I'm thinking a nice cream color (or as this store calls it: Atria Mink) to match our trims...
I think I just may end up getting some verticals, it would be easier with the big windows. The only thing is the verticals don't usually come in room darkening. (Or do they? anybody know?)
Of course I have to go eat lunch first. I shall present these to my bossman when he returns to the office. There will be photos coming when the treatments are installed...

In a minute...

there will be another broken window-this time in my office. Stoopid has not learned that I know how to do my job. Stoopid also ignores the other agents when they complain that the market is slow. Stoopid came to me the other day and asked me why her properties weren't selling.
blink.
blink.
blinkblinkblink.
She has been a Real Estate Agent for 13 years, you figure she would know that sometimes things just don't move for a while.
The Shitter has stopped nagging me when he is on the calendar, he knows no one calls for most of the day so he doesn't even ask me. He just calls 70 times a day to check his voicemail for non-existant messages. He has to call me because Stoopid is using the back line for her own personal phone calls, and stays on the line for hours like a teenage girl. Stoopid has begun to nag me about her being on the calendar. She just walked through the door, announcing to the whole office (me and the cobwebs) that she has arrived and it is her day, bring on the phonecalls.
blink.
blink.
What phonecalls?
The last time she was on the calendar she really asked me what time it is the day is over.
blinkblinkblink.
"The calendar day ends when I leave the office at five."
"You couldn't possibly leave the phones on when I am on the calendar so I can stay in the office past five?"
Are we really going to get into this again?
Yesterday was The Shitter's day on the calendar, and at four she really asked me "What are you still doing here? Aren't you going home?"
"I go home at five."
"Says who?"
"Says the man who signs my paychecks."
She just wanted me to leave so she can answer the million calls we were going to get between four and five. How about YOU go home and leave me the fuck alone? geez...

A girl can dream

My sister's boss eloped for her wedding last year. They had a Maui Wedding, complete with the bare feet on the beach, leis around their necks, natural beautiful sunset in the backround...
I wish I could have a wedding in Hawaii. I remember the day she came with the photos for the first time I looked at them dreaming that could have been me and Daddy. My sister told me she had brought the photo album in for one of their clients to see and it sparked a sense of nostalgia in the place, where everyone was sighing and smiling and dreaming. My cousin's recent wedding on the beach was beautiful, but it wasn't Hawaii. I'm sure my cousin would have loved to get married there, but I doubt the family would have gone and paid for those plane tickets...

Horse Pills

So I went to the doc yesterday. I tried to get out of it...I really did.
"Who will stay with Little Man? I can't have him running around the office like a monkey." I asked Daddy on the way to pick Little Man up from the sitter.
"I will stay home with him." he says.
"But then you can't come with me. He should probably stay with my mother."
"Your mother still has that sinus infection, do you really want to risk Little Man getting sick?"
Shit. Good point, asshole.
"I have to cook you guys something to eat."
"You didn't take any meat out of the freezer this morning..."
"Then we'll just wait for it to thaw."
"Let's order pizza."
Shit. but wait...the pizza could take forever to get here...
The doorbell rang twenty minutes later.
Nice day to be EARLY dipshit.
I asked my mother to go with me, yeah I'm a big baby.
I get to the medical center and there are two people in the waiting room. I fill out the paper work, and try to sit (it's already beyond uncomfortable) and read a magazine. Half an hour later I'm ushered into a room and told that a nurse would be with me shortly.
Enter Cute Male Nurse...
Figures.
"What seems to be the problem?"
I describe the bump, tell him it hurts, tell him it's leaking (yes, it was leaking clear fluids. Have I grossed you out yet? I was thinking maybe it was my spinal fluid and any moment now I would lose sensation in my legs...) and tell him it hurts. Did I mention it hurts?
He takes my blood pressure and temp. "So you work at Company Name here, huh? How's business?"
Are you kidding? You're taking my vitals and I could die on this bed and you want me to talk Real Estate with you? Dude...
"It's a little slow."
"So now is not a good time to think about selling?"
Dude...

Enter Doctor.
"I'm going to ask you to lie on the bed facing the wall so I can see the bump...
Hmmm. I see."
I get back up.
"You have an abscess. Blah,blah,blah, soak in the tub twice a day I'm a mother and I work full time I can't soak in a tub twice a day! It's a miracle I get ten minutes for my morning shower!, blah blah blah, I'll give you a shot of antibiotics along with a script. The nurse will be with you in a moment."

Enter Cute Male Nurse.
"The doctor wants you to come back Thursday so we can check it again and see if it should be drained. I'm going to give you a shot of antibiotic and you'll also get a script for Vicodin because it's going to hurt."
Vicodin for a shot of antibiotics? Is it too late to say I was making the whole thing up?

I can see why they wanted to give me the vic's...that shot hurt like I was getting another epidural. Holy hell... I swear my leg went numb how the hell am I going to drive home? and they made me sit there for 45 minutes while it "sunk in". I drove with my left foot, try it and see how safe that really is. I went to the 24 hour pharmacy near my mother's house to fill my scripts. The antibiotics look like horse pills, they are HUGE.

I got home about tenish, the boy and Daddy were asleep. Great, he didn't even miss me.

The good news is as of this morning the bump went down, but it still kinda hurts. So hopefully when I go tomorrow I can pretty much just wait for the antibiotics to kick in full gear and take care of it without cutting me open. 'Cause then the alien would come out before it's ready, huh Tony?

I'm serious this time.

My pain returned last night. It has not come to me since that one day, but last night it came hard and strong. What's killer is that now there is a welt the size of a ping-pong ball coming out of my skin, and IT HURTS! So, yes, I have called the doctor and I'm seeing him when I get out of work today. It came out of no where, it's not like it was a pimple that grew, it just showed up. Daddy keeps telling me not to touch it, but last night I wanted to see it and I was contorting myself in front of the bathroom mirror, not a nice sight, but I wanted to see what the mutation looked like!
So hope there is nothing seriously wrong with me, and that it IS just a pimple that grew to monstrous sizes...
Update tomorrow if I'm not tied to a hospital bed with an IV pumping drugs into me. (And I say this because my mother went into the hospital with a mosquito bite and stayed for almost three weeks!)

Woo-hoo! Look at me!

I have lost eight pounds. Not much, but you know what? I'm happy. I want to lose maybe 25 more, but Daddy keeps telling me to lose only 10. We constantly battle it out over how much weight I should lose, he doesn't want me to go back down too far. I don't either, its not like I want to look like a skeleton again! (Did you see the pic of me when I was 95lbs? All bones!) I want to have some meat on me but I want to lose the extra stuff i don't need. I want to be able to put on a pair of jeans without having the spare tire hanging off the edges (eewwww) and I want to wear fitted shirts without having to worry that people are trying to figure if I'm pregnant or not.
I want to be able to wear some sexy short shorts around the house without wondering if my husband just thinks I've gone looney from wishful thinking. I would say I want to wear sexy lingerie but with my son hanging around all the time...well, let's just say I can't but not only because of my excess weight. (Hello! Little Man! GO BACK TO YOUR CRIB, 'kay? For Mommy's sake and sanity!)
Daddy has gotten a belly himself. We laugh about it all the time. I tell him he has a beer belly without drinking beer! He doesn't mind it, I don't mind it. Maybe I'll just buy him an elephant to show how much I don't mind his belly! LOL!

HA!

Is it a surprise his name comes up as #1 when you type "failure" into google???

Drama Filled Friday...

...on Monday.


Yeah, it's late but go figure I was busy Friday. (Because Karma read my Bored post.) We got another new agent in and I had to have her be my shadow all day. What would she think if she knew I spent most of my boring days checking blogs out? And playing games?
So far, she seems pretty normal.
So far.

Friday started off pretty dramatic, let me give you an overview: We have a corner business. We are on the corner of two very high profile streets in town, great location. (Isn't that what Real Estate is all about? Location, location, location!) To our left there is a phone shop that rents their space from my bossman. They got broken into Thursday night/Friday morning, the thieves took over $8,000 in merchandise (mostly the expensive Nextel phones) and leaving the shop owner with a mess of glass all over the shop and sidewalk. She has floor to ceiling windows like we have, and they broke one and walked right in. Now, her alarm system is usually highly sensitive. Sometimes it goes off if we so much as touch the adjoining doors in the back. Are you surprised the alarms didn't go off? I'm not. Isn't that the way Karma works? Now, with us being in this very high profile area, there is a constant flow of cops in the area, driving up and down the avenue, riding their bikes, walking, making sure everyone is okay and everything is running smoothly. They stop in and say hello sometimes since we see them many times a day. Do you think anyone saw the thieves break in?
Nope.
Guess how long it took the cops to show up when we called to report a break in?
An hour and a half.
My boss was livid, the shop owner was pissed. They took a report and left, in under ten minutes. No finger prints, no pictures. Nothing.
That was the drama. Then I had a tail all day.
Today, a mountain of paperwork. I like it. The day is going so much faster.

Before I even start my day...

I'd like to say that I watched the Teen Choice Awards last night. Not because I wanted to see who won for Best Grill (WTF was that about? Brooke Hogan?!?) but because I wanted to see K-Fed get boo'd (booed?) off the stage. It didn't happen, but HE SUCKED. Why are people saying he "wasn't half bad." ?????????

Okay

Stupid blogger. I don't know what the hell just happened, but let's just try to pretend I didn't fuck something up.
Back to your regularly scheduled blogging...

Holidays are coming people!

I wanted to take a moment and tell you guys how grateful I am that Supermom in NY put me on to PayPerPost.com. They are an internet site that pays bloggers to advertise on their sites. While many advertisers are picky about who advertises for them, the folks at PayPerPost give everyone an opportunity, even no-name people like me! I'm not trying to be a sell-out, I'm just trying to get a little extra to be able to put away "just in case", because I have learned (the hard way most of the time) that things happen when you have nothing to fall back on. Like my transmission? I was lucky enough to have that happen while we still had some money in the bank, but after I paid the almost $500 it came out to, I had almost nothing. Daddy and I are not rich, we work very hard for our money. But we also have rent. And bills. And a car (which I'm happy to even have.) And a CHILD! WHO EATS! And guess what? That time of year is coming again, when everyone goes crazy looking for gifts, and I don't want what happened last year to happen again. (Where we got to buy basically nothing for our son and/or each other.) So far Ive been paid about $35, waiting for about $80 more (The posts have to be approved first!). Not much, but it helps with gas, and a few groceries here and there.Anyway, if you feel like checking them out, go ahead.What they do is present you with a list of open opportunities, you can incorporate it however you like in your blog. I usually pick things that have something to do with anything that might be going on in real life, so it doesn't sound too much like an advertisment. (Even though I'm sure it still does.) They provide you with the link, optional photos, review the post, and pay you through Paypal.So far I've been able to put some money away, and I'm glad. You just never know...

Testing

Blogger sucks. I'm trying to publish something......


(I was trying to write from somewhere else, and for some reason it's not taking. I guess Blogger wants me to keep writing from work. Is this going to happen when i finally connect my computer at home?)

I'll never get away from it!

RACING!
CARS!
These are the things that are constantly on Daddy's mind. He loooooooves cars and anything that has to do with them. Import cars, muscle cars, show cars, you name it he loves it. He has a stack of magazines that fills a big giant cardboard box to the very top. Don't try to throw these magazines away...nonoNO, you will DIIIIIIEEEEEE! I swear if I added up the cost of all those magazines (they average about 3-5 bucks apiece) there would be THOUSANDS of dollars in the box. I should sell them on e-bay...hmmm...(insert evil laugh here.)
Do you know how happy Daddy was when we had digital cable? (Which we don't anymore because why are we going to pay all that money when we aren't even home...ever?) Do you know how happy he was when we had the Speed Channel? All racing, all cars, all the time! That man would be up at eight o'clock on a Sunday morning just to watch his shows. I will admit, there were a couple that I was addicted to, one being Pinks! and another being the Nascar. (Pinks! is a show where two people bring their cars to race eachother for their pink slips, loser loses their car. I loooooved it. I miss it!) Nascar I liked because it was actually exciting to watch sometimes, they have some crazy accidents on there sometimes, it's scary. Daddy wouldn't move from the couch if a new episode of any of his shows were on. He would take notes when shows had their step-by-steps on how to change this or fix that...

Well, I'm thinking on putting the digital back on. Racing Season is almost over here on the East Coast, our last trip to New Hampshire will be in October, and then we wait until next May when they open the track again. Maybe it will be a nice birthday present for Daddy...

Another Late Meme

Mama of 2- My apologies that this took so long. But I'm doing it! I needed to get my mind off that stupid birthday party dilemna, and this is the way to do it, so thank you. (BTW- I have read all your comments, and I thank you for you input. I will be responding to the questions soon.)

Meme For Babies

3 things that scare me:

• The sound of a vaccuum
• A dog barking
• Loud cars
  

3 people that make me laugh:

• Daddy
• Mommy
• My Auntie

3 things I love:

• Giving hugs and kisses
• Drawing
• Taking baths

3 things I hate:

• Going to sleep in my crib
• Getting shots
• When Mommy tells me "NO"

3 things I don't understand:

• Why Mommy won't let me color on the walls
• Why I can't scream at the top of my lungs at the market
• Why I can't throw my food
  

3 things on my floor:

• A few sippy cups that I took out of the strainer (I'm a tall boy!)
• My favorite blanket
• My shoes

3 things I am doing right now:

• Terrorizing my babysitter
• Probably crying
• Or screaming

3 things I want to do before I die:

• Color on those walls, they would be so much prettier in purple
• Jump in the pool by myself
• Drive a car

3 ways to describe my personality:

• Demanding
• Loving
• Fun
  

3 things you should listen to:

• My mother's voice when she turns red, it's quite funny
• My rendition of Elmo's Song
• Mommy AND Daddy's singing in the car, now THAT'S funny!
  

3 things you shouldn't listen to:

• "NO" (Who really does?)
• "Stop"
• "Come here now"

3 absolute favorite foods:

• CHEESE
• Banana
• Meat

3 things I'd like to learn:

• How to drive
• How to put cars together like my Daddy
• How to work the remote
  

3 beverages I drink regularly:

• Milk
• Juice
• Water
  

3 shows I watch:

• Sesame Street
• Doodle Bops
• Bear in the Big Blue House
  

3 babies I tag:

• Baby A and Baby B (You wanted a meme here ya go!)
• Rio (In case you don't have anything else to write about!)
• Any body else on my mommy's blogroll...let's get to know YOU!

What would YOU do?

My SIL called me last night to invite me to my MIL's birthday party coming up in two weeks. "Girls only!" She said. "There is going to be a stripper!"
Oh joy.
I don't like strippers, but it's my MIL's birthday and it would be so rude of me not to go. We talked for a few minutes and she ended up asking me if Daddy would watch Little Daddy that night.
Why would she be asking me that?
The Whore is going to be there.
Tires screeching, glass shattering, screaming monkeys in the backround.

This is where it gets interesting: His whole family still talks to The Whore. BOTH of my SIL's still invite her over to their houses, they take Little Daddy overnight (even when WE are not 'allowed' to) they talk on the phone constantly. It's easy for me to pretend I don't know about it, because at least they have the decency to not have her around while I'm around. At least they don't talk about her (too much) in front of me. But IT BOTHERS THE FUCK OUT OF ME. After she told me that, I got quiet. I started scanning my mental files to see if I have anything to do around that time...anything to get me out of going to the damn party. When I got off the phone, I told Daddy. He understood for a moment, then (THEN!?!) decided to say "Well, it's not like you have to talk to her or anything. You're going to be there for my mom." Yeah, dude I totally see your point but nobody seems to be seeing MINE! I don't want to be around her. I don't want to see her. I will be thinking of different ways to scratch her fucking eyes out the whole time I'm there. I don't understand why your whole fucking family is still buddy-buddy with her.
Maybe I'm over-reacting, but I don't see why they include her for family events. She's Little Daddy's mother, who gives a shit. I was the one taking care of Little Daddy when she decided she didn't want to be a mother anymore, when she decided to move to Florida and leave him here. We had custody of him for more than a year and a half, it was only when I got pregnant that she decided she wanted to be a mommy again and took him away from us, playing these fucking games where we can't even see him FOR MONTHS!
My blood literally boils when I am around her, you couldn't even understand unless you've been in this situation...
I really don't want to go to the party, but I have to, don't I?
What would you do?
Please tell me what I can do! I'm begging here.

Booooored!

Things are slow!
My office phone rings maybe once an hour, if that. Half the time it's a wrong number, we get a lot of phone calls here looking for a doctor's office.
It sucks, because while I still get paid my hourly rate, I feel bad for the agents whose income is based solely on what they sell. Don't sell=don't get paid.
I guess that's why The Mortgage Guy didn't come around for a while, there is just nothing moving right now. He's all about selling home loans and refinancing, but if no one is buying a home, who can he sell these to?
Prices on homes are going down...
Sellers are getting frustrated when their home doesn't sell...
It's crappy. It makes me feel crappy that Self-Proclaimed Supermom has to sit on her hands until someone makes an offer on her house. It makes me feel crappy that people go out and look at a house and don't make offers. (In her case as well as the agents in my office, who have to go out and show houses just to hear "We'll think about it.")
The problem is (and this is totally just my opinion) that everyone is trying to enjoy their summer. Everyone is on vacation, or preparing for school and no one is actually out looking for houses. I'm hoping everything picks up in September, because when I started here last year it was much busier in the Fall.
I couldn't be a real estate agent with out something else bringing money in, I'd die if I had no idea when my next paycheck was coming in.

Funny Pics

I'm on a roll, now that I had Oh, The Joys help me with uploading photos (read:explained it to me like I was three. Which, hello! is the only language I understand anyway! THANK YOU AGAIN!) I can share more stories.
Daddy and I went to a friend's house the other day because this friend wanted Daddy to put a belt on his car for him. So when we get to his house he is holding the packaging it came in, I grabbed it from his hand and tell him that they sent him a broken belt.
"What are you talking about?" He asks.
"LOOK!" The packaging says:



(don't bend, in English AND Japanese)

and yet...



it's totally bent.

I just wanted to make him laugh. I thought it was funny.
Okay, maybe just me.


NEXT! I was washing the dishes and Little Man wanted to be outside so I tell Daddy to get him dressed and bring him out, I would be out soon and we could take him to the park or something. So I go outside and the first thing I say to Daddy is "Dude, you forgot his belt didn't you?" He looks at me, sees that I'm fumbling with the camera trying to get the damn picture, looks at Little Man and starts laughing...

"OOPS!" he says.
My poor son.

Another Picture of ME- (close your eyes!)

This was me the day we found out I was pregnant. Look at my collar bone how it stuck out, I was 95 lbs. soaking wet, and not because I didn't eat (!) because I ate like a pig. I was always super-skinny while I was growing up, those days are over I wish I could lose about 15-20 lbs. now and it's haaaaard. And my eighthead (it's so big it can't be called a forehead! get it? LOL)
Geez, I can't believe I'm posting it, but there you go, so you guys can put a face to the name.

An Ode to Dead Batteries (or The Story of Me & Daddy)

I dropped out of high school at the end of my sophomore year, took a year off then dropped back in at a different high school. At my first high school, it was all about the friends, the clothes, the parties, being popular, not the academics. I didn't like the way I was being. I spent most of my "year off" taking placement tests to prove I wasn't stupid so I could get back into school. (My mother had 'given up' on me, she told me since I thought I was an adult I would have to do all that myself. And I did.) I got back into school, and I didn't make an effort to make friends. I didn't care what I was wearing, I was usually in sweat pants and a t-shirt. I ate lunch with my head buried in a book. I turned down invitations to parties and really never spoke. The majority of the people thought I was conceited, but there were a few who understood. One of them was this guy in my English class, let's call him D.J. He sat in front of me (I sat all the way in the back) and would turn around daily to ask me for pens, paper, answers...anything to get me to talk to him. He was funny, he made me laugh and I would come out of my shell long enough for us to strike up conversation during class. He started having lunch with me, he started waiting for me between classes, he started bringing me candy on a daily basis. (His parents owned a store.) One day I explained The Chocolate Orgasm to him, and from that day on he would bring me a candy bar. (Does anyone know what that is? If not, I will show you my geekiness and tell you some other time.) He never asked me out, he knew I had a boyfriend because I was sporting a diamond engagement ring on my finger, we were the greatest of friends. (Um, yeah I had a boyfriend since my freshman year who gave me a ring but I think it was more out of his own insecurity than out of love.) D.J would always tell me stories about his family, his sisters and brother and his crazy ass cousins. I always listened but these people would never have faces to me, they would just be names in a story. The next year, it was the same with D.J and me...and then I graduated. With Honors. He called me during the summer to tell me that he didn't know what the hell he was supposed to do the following year without me in class with him. (He was a year behind me.) I called him to tell him of my success at breaking up with my cheating boyfriend.
The summer I graduated I was eighteen, working like crazy so I could buy my own car and 'get away'. He came with me when I went to buy my car. Every night we would go out for hours, just driving and talking. (Gas was cheaper, we could do that.)
I started college, going into my shell again so I could focus. Weekends were my time to go out and have fun. I dated here and there but nothing serious. D.J and I would still talk, he told me of a girl he was wanting to date and I would give him tips on how to not be so shy and make his intentions known. The following summer I decided to work full time because the offer was just too good. There was one night that another friend of mine called asking me to go to the movies, and just as I was going to her house D.J called me to ask me something. To this day I can't remember what it was...but it required me going to where he was at one of his cousin's houses. I get there and there were a lot of people there, he told me they were thinking of having a BBQ, did I want to stay? "No, no I have plans, I'll come back later." Just as I was leaving someone started calling D.J's name and I saw someone coming towards my car. "Hey, Diana, this is my cousin, Daddy. Daddy, this is Diana." We nodded at eachother, he asked D.J a question and went back to the crowd.
I didn't even look at him twice. (Nice, huh?)
After the movies I noticed my headlights were flickering. I called D.J to ask him if he knew what that meant and he told me to go back to his cousin's house, he had a cousin who knew about cars and he would have him check it out.
It was Daddy. "Your battery is going, you should buy a new one."
"Thanks." And I went home. Or tried to, the car died before I got to my street. I call D.J frantic and tell him I was stuck on the side of the road and I didn't have jumper cables and hurry up and get here before I get killed! (You know, because young girls on the side of the road are the biggest target. Whatever, I was paranoid.)
D.J came with Daddy and a pair of jumper cables. They jumped my car and followed me home, by that time the battery was dead again. "Okay, it's the alternator." Daddy says. I gave him a blank look. D.J explained my knowledge in the car department, which consisted of starting it, driving it, and putting gas in it. D.J knew of a place near his job that rebuilds alternators, could go there, so plans were made to get my car towed there so they can fix it. As we are on our way, D.J's boss calls him in to work so Daddy is waiting with me while they check the car. "It'll be a couple of days," they say. Groan! I go home and mope.
After that drama Daddy started coming on our rides-going-no-where. Daddy started calling me to see how I was if I didn't come around D.J's house. Daddy started calling to say hi. One night D.J didn't come on our usual ride-to-no-where so Daddy and I hung out at a park and talked all night.
October 13th-I could never forget this date-D.J called and invited me to go with him to Daddy's house to watch movies. After work, I went home and showered and call D.J to ask his ETA to Daddy's house. "OH, I'm running late. I'll meet you there."
Okaaaaaaaaaaay.....
It was just me and Daddy, we saw Donny Darko and had pizza.
Something happened that night that neither of us could explain. By the time D.J got there, Daddy and I felt it was so obvious, this attraction...this inexplicable feeling...
The rest....is history.
Not your classic love story, but it's mine. Now, for those of you who promised yours...get started.

This is what I looked like my sophomore year of high school, pre-drop out:

Lunch time rewind

Except it's about three hours after lunch time...so what? I owe some people a couple of meme's and some stories, but I had to post this picture up for Supermom...see she makes these amazing bows that she is going to start selling, and as I don't have a daughter (yet) I won't be able to buy any (yet). Stop by her site and see what she has...
This picture is of me and my sister...ages 7 and 14 respectively. Look at my bow! And look at our bangs! It was 1989...mucho Aqua Net! Yeah this is a picture of a picture, my mother was NOT trying to let me take the picture to be scanned, so i had to break all kinds of copyright laws...anyway, here you go. What I looked like 17 years ago.

*I'm trying to post two other photos, more recent one's and stoooopid stoooooooopid blogger won't upload them, but it did this one with no problem....aaaaarrrrrggggghhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

Things I learned over the weekend

• After I wrote this post, The Mortgage Guy seemed to disappear. He didn't come into the office for like three weeks. I don't know what went on, but my boss seems to have made a contract with another Mortgage Company and had a meeting with The Mortgage Guy's company to let them know. The Mortgage Guy (TMG) came in to say his good-byes to the agents, letting them know they could still call him if they need anything. As he was leaving he said "I'll e-mail you sometime just to see how you're doing." I wasnt expecting an e-mail on Friday night saying "So do you miss me yet?" WTF DUDE??? I didn't answer it. I erased it faster than anything. I didn't learn anything from this, i just wanted to share it.
• I learned my son looooves swimming, even though he doesn't really know how. I went to my mother's house on Saturday and Sunday morning while Daddy worked on his damn project-car-that-still-isn't-fucking-running-hurry-up-and-finish-the-thing. Her building has a pool that no one ever uses so Little Man and I had it to ourselves. I was mainly just walking around the shallow end with him, holding him out so he could "float" but he was kicking his legs and I swear he could almost do the doggie paddle. I wish my mother hadn't been inside with a fever, she could have taken pics for you guys to see. If next weekend is nice enough I'll take him there again and have some pics.
• I learned that as soon as you say "I'll be right back." to your husband and child, you will get on the highway only to discover that it has been closed because a Dump Truck has turned over and is in pieces across the whole highway, so your short trip to the store for your mother (who is in bed with fevers and chills, fun!) becomes an extended adventure of sight-seeing as you take the 'local' roads across three towns. Don't ever say "I'll be right back." Don't ever say "Mom, I'll be right there, five minutes." These two phrases will cause a chain reaction in the stars to create obstacles to put in your way so you will learn to stop saying these phrases. (The driver of the Dump Truck is fine. I can't find anything on the accident in the paper or on-line. Hmmmm)

Read my shirt!

Okay, so by popular demand, I will be telling the story of how Daddy and I met. I will have to start working on it ASAP, for now you get some other stuff.
Obviously everyone has noticed how popular it is to have some sort of quirky saying on your shirt. Freedom of expression has come alive with T-shirts saying things for you.
I recently bought a T-shirt for Daddy that has the Simpsons on it posing like the Sopranos. Instead of the gun like in the Sopranos "p", there is a donut in the Simpsons "o", I bought it for him because I thought it was pretty funny. Thankfully he liked it, and the reaction he got at work when he wore it for the first time was great. (Yeah, I'm jealous he gets to wear t-shirts and jeans to work!)
Will this phenomenom ever end? Probably about the same time reality t.v goes to hell...
A lot of the t-shirts I've been seeing lately (since I work near two of the colleges in this state, one being an Ivy League School...hmmm) have college-sayings on them. Here are some I found at a web-site run by college kids: (Hey, I never got to go away for college, I never got to do any of this stuff so I have to laugh with them.)

Are you interested?

Oh, The Joys has requested the story on how Daddy and I met. So, if anyone else is actually interested on how the planets aligned themselves that fateful day my car broke down to bring him to my rescue...I will tell it.
First let me know if you're interested, because I'm not going to share the insanely funny-the-way-things-work-out story if no one cares.
It will give me something to write about next week.

Nosey Fucking Bastard

Second name for The Shitter.
I was sending a fax to The Other Office and he can't stop himself from coming over to see what the fax is. Not only that, but if a fax is coming through he has to come see what it is. Have you ever heard of CONFIDENTIALITY asshole?
If someone comes in from outside he has to stop what he is doing to see who it is, even if it's not for him.
Geez, Louise, get a fucking life!

Be nice to me, I gave blood today

That's what I should say when I answer the phone for the rest of the afternoon.
Now I'm all lightheaded and loopy, but I donated! I left my phone in the car, and Daddy has the car but I will have to remember to post a picture of my arm, it looks very interesting. They had a blood drive right across the street from my job so I couldn't just ignore them and their Big Rig...I went in. It took almost an hour for the whole process but an actual total of nine minutes for me to fill the bag up, not bad...
I was having way too much fun with the girls in there, and they gave me like four packages of cookies to take home to Little Man.
So, hopefully the blood I gave will help someone.
Okay, my brain is not forming coherent thoughts right now, so I have to stop trying to write.
I'm going to look for some funnies to get you guys throught the weekend with some laughs.

What I would rather be doing-

Ever since I was a little girl if someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up I would always say "Doctor!". It varied from time to time depending on the day, because sometimes I would say "Vet!" (which, I am ashamed to admit I had called it veteran once or twice because veterinarian sounded almost the same if you said it fast enough. yeah, I was smart!) But I always answered something that had to do with the medical field. After many years, my answer became "Nurse." because I lost my confidence and figured I could never make it all the way to medical school. I have just always wanted to be in a field that helped people. ER was my favorite show since they premiered, (I'm going to end up with the whole DVD collection very soon, don't tell Daddy!) and I followed it faithfully until they got rid of the whole original cast. (Don't even get me started on that.) but I loved the way the show was so realistic and I was always like "Oh! I want to be doing that!!!"
Anyway, before I found out I was pregnant with Little Man I was working for a Urologist. I loved that job. I was a receptionist there, too, but the Medical Assistant there would use me as a translator as needed and she was also showing me the ropes so that I could try and get the Doctor to pay for my Medical Assistant classes so I could get my foot in the door with the field. I would analyze the pee-pee and check it for protein and all that good stuff, I would stand in when the doctor had a female patient if the M. A was in another room. I helped people. And I loved it. And I didn't have to dress up, all we had to wear was scrubs and they were the most comfortable thing EVER! (And oh the stories I have from there! We gave samples of V!agra...)
So, when I found out I was pregnant with my Little Man I was showing right away. With my growing belly, I was so grateful that I only had to wear scrubs to work, since most of the pants tie in the front or have elastic and are lightweight and OH! SO! COMFORTABLE!...I couldn't have loved them anymore for saving me so much money on Maternity wear.
Maybe that's really why I want to be in the medical field..for the scrubs! I don't want to dress up!
Seriously, my thoughts keep going back to going back to school. I'm waiting for a time when it will be more 'convenient' but afraid that time won't come. I still want to be in the medical field. To help people, but to also wear scrubs all day! (Joking, it's mostly to help!)
So if I DO quit this job, it will probably not be to go to another Real Estate Office, instead probably back to the medical world. A friend of mine (who got me the job at the Urologist's) is now the manager of another Doctor's office. Perhaps I will call her and let her know I'm open to leaving here for something I'm more interested in pursuing in the future...

Open Letter

Dear Asshole Who Just Called Here:

Fuck You.
Guess you're pretty pissed now that you can't see the house, huh? Did you think that by yelling at me you were going to get somewhere? Did it surprise you that the listing agent told you that you could not speak to me that way and because of that he would not be doing any business with you?
Should have been nicer to me when I asked you to hold, it wasn't going to kill you to wait five seconds for him to get off the phone.
Again, Fuck You.

Have a great day!
*smile*

Um, aren't you supposed to be at the Other Office???

So the plans to move me to The Other Office have apparently been postponed... I don't think my boss had the heart to let The Other Admin go. Fine, cool, no problem, I like this office waaay more anyway. But, do I still get my dollar raise??? I just had my one year anniversary with the company, and it went by without so much as a "hey, thanks, here's a couple of cents to show that we like you."
Here's a kicker for you, one of the agents (that I like) just gave his notice. He works with a team and has decided to open up his own office and he told me he wants me to go with him. He told me I was going no where with this place uh, thanks and he would pay me SIX DOLLARS more than I make now.

How much???
Fifteen dollars an hour. To answer phones and do paperwork.

I can't do it.

*ducking the shoes being thrown at me through the internet*

As much as I complain about this place, I can't leave. My boss has children, so he understands when I need a day off or when I need to leave in the middle of the afternoon because my son has sprung a fever. The agent- let's call him Beantown (he loves those God forsaken Sox-ack!) does not have children, and he is not as flexible as my boss. I don't think he would understand the need for me to leave the office in a moment's notice to go get my son for some reason or another. And those "pesky" doctor's appointments that can only occur during my work hours...
But a part of me is saying Fifteen dollars! Christmas is coming! Little Man's and Daddy's birthdays are coming! What are you thinking?
My boss has been so good to me...
I just can't. Yeah, the money would be great, but I just can't.
Tell me I'm not crazy.
Or tell me I am.
ugh, I hate this.



***Edited to add: I haven't said no. I told him "We'll talk."

Whaaaaaaaat?

"Hello, is agent who is not in the office there?" (I know you guys love posts that start with this question, it can only mean there is someone stupider than Stoopid out there...)
"No, he isn't but I can give you his cell phone number if you'd like."
"No, I just wanted to now how much a house he is listing costs."
"Well, would you like to leave him a message on his voicemail?"
"No, I don't have a phone right now. I'll call back."

Wait...
Whaaaaat?
What the hell did you just use to call me?

I guess it wasn't important enough

I heard this story on the news last night, but for some reason I can't find it in the on-line paper. It breaks my heart, so I'm going to talk about it here.
A child has been killed. I think he is a child, though he is 17...he still had a shitload of life ahead of him. This is such a redundant story, you hear it so often but people still don't do anything to try to prevent it. He found his father's gun, he and a friend were playing with it and it accidently went off. Yes, accidently. And now he's dead. Why couldn't his father keep the gun locked? Or why was it loaded for that matter? Why did his father have the gun somewhere that the kid could find it? What the hell was the kid doing playing with a gun? I understand that some people feel safer with a loaded gun in the house, but is it worth your child's life? Is it really? They're thinking about charging the father with involuntary manslaughter or something like that and obviously have taken the gun away. People, for the love of your children please please PLEASE if you MUST have a gun in the house, lock it up. Don't keep it loaded, don't keep it somewhere that your children can find it. You know what? Just buy a gun safe to lock it up in, I've seen pictures of these safes around, they have to be good. They can save the life of your child, they can save your life. If only that man had had his gun locked up, he would still have his son...

Anybody want to work in my office?

Just for a week? I need a vacation. I don't even want to go anywhere special I just want to get away from here for a little while.
You won't get paid much, but you will be endlessly entertained by the idiots who work here...
I think one day I'll end up going postal on The Shitter or Stoopid...I fear for their lives.

Who wants to go home at 5 anyway? Not me!

Last night I shut everything down in the office and passed Stoopid's office waving good-bye, not wanting her to stop me to ask me how her keyboard works...because she did once. I swear. But! She stopped me.
*grumble grumble grumble*
"How do I answer the phone when you leave?"
I need to buy a tape recorder to record this, the internets are going to stop believing she really asks me these questions.
"The same way you answer it when I am here, you pick up the receiver when your line rings."
"Don't you shut the phones off?"
"I just put the voicemail on, I don't shut the phones completely off. My message system lets everyone know that the office is closed and allows the caller to still reach your extension if they need to."
"So will my phone ring?"
"If someone dials your extension, yes."
"But what if they don't?"
"Then it won't."
"But how do I answer it?"
I need a very stiff drink.
*sigh*"If your phone rings, pick it up. You don't have to do anything special. Just. Pick. It. Up."
"Can't you just leave the phones on?"
"I. Don't. Shut. The. Phone. Off. If I leave the message system off and Bossman calls to check his voicemail, he will fire me. It is my JOB to put the phones on 'answer' when I leave the office."
"But people will think I am not here."
"Then let them know that when the message system comes on, all they have to do is dial your extension and your phone will ring."
"But what if they don't know my extension?"
"The message system says your name and extension..."
"So how do I answer it then?"
Oh Jesus.

Loving the Gnomes

Dawn has garden gnomes, and when she first posted pictures of them I immediately fell in love. I laughed so hard at the gnomes playing chess, I wished I had a garden to put them in because, well, they're cute. There is a point, I swear...
The other night I noticed the light in the back of the house went out, and the damn thing is so high no one will ever get to it to be able to change it. I told Daddy we had to get something to light the back up because I always go in through the back and I wouldn't feel safe walking with Little Man back there. I know we could easily get another set of motion sensor flood lights like we have in the actual driveway, but wouldn't these little solar lights * look so much better? My whole argument will be that it will cost less than the flood lights, it wouldn't add to our electric bill (which is through the damn roof as it is) and I know I will have convinced Daddy. But really, I just want the gnomes! Or maybe the giant mushroom...

*stupid blogger won't let me upload the picture of the gnomes playing chess...so I put the whole link on.

Is racing season almost done???

I wasn't going to go this time. I had told Daddy to go by himself (well, with his friends, just without me!) but Friday came and he was all puppy-eyed about me going. So I went.
I'm a sucker for his puppy dog eyes.

Anyway: this time I have photos! YAY!
First: The drifting competition. Drifting is an art form, I truly love watching this and it was the first time I've ever been able to see it in person. (The link has videos so you can see what I'm talking about.) The photo shown above is of A FEMALE DRIVER so I am posting it proudly. She ended up crashing during practice and getting some pretty bad damage to her car, but she still came into the competition strong.

Next:Beautiful artwork on one of the racecars. We arrived about a half hour before the doors opened, and when the doors opened it was still about an hour before any competitions started so we walked around to look at the prepping. I love the artwork on this car, it was done with such careful detail. This is just the door, I couldn't get a shot of the hood like I wanted because the stupid glare of the morning sun...
Then there was the Marines' Hummer.Someone else had posted a picture and the story of another Hummer, and I can't find the post. So MomisNutz, I'm almost positive it was you that had the post, this one is for you.

Then our friend .L. put her car up on the Dyno to see just how much power it has...
It came back having 172 horses to the wheels...not bad for a daily driver!

And the best photo for the mommies...

While I don't know how safe it is, here is a photo of a mommy with her twin girls on a 4 wheeler. The girls are in car seats, which was what I thought was cute and why I took the photo.
It was a full weekend event, since it was being held by Nopi, but we couldn't stay the whole weekend. We wish we could have...
It was fun. I'm glad Daddy gave me the puppy dog eyes so that I'd go. My cousin had a blast, too. He's already making plans to come up for the next races so he can go with Daddy....I'm not going...

maybe...

Some people are just ridiculous.

I have to tell you guys about my weekend, complete with pictures from Saturday, but Sunday will come first.
There was a festival in our town this weekend, but we only went yesterday because we had gone to (more) races in New Hampshire on Saturday. My cousin from back home was visiting and we didn't want him to be bored so we went to the festival. There were many food trucks that made sandwiches and had a bunch of greay messy foods for sale, so obviously that area was crowded. And of course, that's where we stood for a while. Little Man was in his stroller, happily eating a ham and cheese sandwich watching all the people walk by. Daddy and I saw a lot of people we knew in high school, most of them surprised to see me and Daddy together, married, with Little Man. (Did I ever mention Daddy and I didn't even know eachother in high school? I was quiet and studious and he, well, wasn't. One day I will have to tell you how we met.) So there was this couple, that also got together after high scholl standing there chatting with us when a group of girls passes by. Girls. They couldn't have been more than 16. One bumps into another girl standing a few feet away from us and apparently didn't say "excuse me" because the bumpee said something along the lines of the bumper being rude. The bumper heard her and turned around and started screaming at the bumpee. My cousin's eyes widened and he grabbed the stroller and walked over to the left where there weren't so many people standing. Daddy grabs me and moves me over as well. The two little girls are standing there screaming at eachother, we were expecting them to break out the boxing gloves any second. All I could think was how ridiculous they looked and how much they were embarrasing themselves to no end. Eventually it settled down with no one getting hurt, but it's the fact that it even escalated to almost becoming a fist fight...
All I can do is shake my head. I hope I never looked like that when I was younger...
Oh! And don't even get me started on the clothes people were wearing... Kristen, I wish you could have seen how many chicks were wearing the spandex under the short skirts, and some were even wearing them under short-shorts! I couldn't get any photos because my stupid phone died and I didn't have anything else with me! Oh the horror of this fashion!